Thursday, October 11, 2012

Good Days & Bad Days

This road we're on with Zachary is filled with unknown, joy, fear, and a multitude of other emotions.  Most days I am fine. I feel the prayers of so many for Zachary as well as Peter and I as parents. Most days I simply forget how old Z really is and feel like I still have a newborn. Other days, like yesterday, the frustration creeps back in. At therapy Z did nothing they tried to get him to do. He cried. His body felt more limp than normal. He hates it when anyone tries to get him to work. I left with tears in my eyes, frustration brewing. Why? Why?Why? Why can't my 17 month old sit up? Why won't he stand on his legs? Will he ever sit? Crawl? Walk? I know these feelings aren't of God. But I can't dismiss my broken mother's heart.

This morning was a new day, and the first thing Zachary did when I brought him down this morning and set him on the floor, was to roll on his tummy and use his arms to make him spin a bit. This is huge - to be able to use strength in his arms to make him move, however small a move it was. I'm better today - thankful that my doom and gloom emotions only lasted a day.

Pressing onward, and keeping my eyes ever on the Lord,


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